No joke: Guatemalan comedian wins presidency in landslide

Third World silliness…

Former TV comedian Jimmy Morales, who has no experience in government, won Guatemala’s presidential election in a landslide on Sunday after a corruption scandal toppled the last president and stoked outrage with the political establishment.

The headquarters of Morales’ National Convergence Front (FCN) party erupted in a celebration with live music and dozens of early revelers.

A political outsider promising clean government, Morales had 72.4 percent of the vote with returns in from 70 percent of polling stations, well ahead of former first lady Sandra Torres, who had around 27.6 percent.

Funny. 🙂

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Political candidate caught peeing in coffee mug in someone else’s kitchen is no longer a political candidate, for some reason

Oops! 🙂

A service technician caught on hidden camera urinating into a coffee mug during a 2012 house call to repair a leaky sink before he became a Conservative federal election candidate is no longer running, the Tories said today.

Jerry Bance “is no longer a candidate,” said Conservative spokesman Stephen Lecce in a brief email to CBC News on Monday.

[…]

The original Marketplace episode had referred to Bance — who owns and operates XPress Appliance Service, an appliance repair company in the Greater Toronto Area — only as “Jerry.” A tip received by CBC News late Sunday night pointed out Jerry is Bance.

Response to the story on social media sites was nearly instantaneous. The hashtag “peegate” was soon trending on Twitter, as Twitter buzzed with disparaging jokes, comments and bad puns targeting Bance and the Conservative Party.

Conservative Leader Stephen Harper in east Toronto on Monday.

And there goes his business, too.

All his fortunes, down the drain. 😉

Bolivian presidential candidate promises to eat his watch and his tie if six out of ten Bolivians vote for the current president

He may have to make good on that promise… 🙂

Be careful what you promise, or you could end up eating your watch. That seems to be the moral for a presidential candidate in Bolivia after the elections last Sunday.

Former president Jorge “Tuto” Quiroga, one of those challenging incumbent President Evo Morales in a national vote this week, made an election promise that may, in retrospect, have been unwise. He promised to eat his watch if “six out of 10 Bolivians” voted for Morales.

He was so confident that Morales wouldn’t make it that he also promised to eat his tie in another interview days later. And now, social media users want to hold him to his word. It has taken several days to count and announce the full results, but early signs suggest that Morales is hovering right around the 60% mark. And so of course, people have taken to Twitter and Facebook to demand that Quiroga keeps his promise.

“When will Tuto Quiroga eat his watch?” asked one. Tuffi Aré, a journalist and prominent Twitter user who interviewed Quiroga before the ballots, tweeted: “Tuto says he will wait for the official figures came out before he eats his watch. He promised me he would eat his tie as well and it is on record.”

Garden gnome alert: 400 missing in Austria

Oh, those wacky Austrians!

A leading Austrian political party has issued a garden gnome alert after 400 of its figurines disappeared from lamp posts used in campaigning.

Placed by the Socialist Party ahead of elections in western Austria, the gnomes were hung three meters from the ground — presumably in part to prevent mass pilfering.

But a party statement Monday said that 400 gnomes, valued at around $4,000, had gone missing over the weekend.

The party suspects the heists were less outright theft and more dirty electioneering, accusing the rival conservative People’s Party of being behind the disappearances.

It notes that some of the gnomes have been replaced by People’s Party posters.

The People’s Party denies involvement in the gnome scandal.

Sriracha sauce becomes a political issue

Hilarious.

Earlier this month, the city of Irwindale, California ruled that the local Huy Fong Foods Sriracha factory is a public nuisance. Now, California Republicans are pledging to “Stand with Sriracha” against Big Government — and people with nosebleeds allegedly caused by the hot sauce smell.