I am writing to confirm that the West Midlands Fire Service has now completed its search for the information you requested on 21st October 2016
Please find below a summary of our findings.
How much money has been paid to exorcists over the past 12 months for properties owned or operated by your organisation.
West Midlands Fire Service has not made any payments to exorcists over the last 12 months. Further information concerning our payments are published and can be found at the following link: https://www.wmfs.net/your-fire-service/openness/documents/
If you have any queries about this letter, please contact me. Please remember to quote the reference number above in any future communications. If you are unhappy with the service you have received in relation to your request and wish to make a complaint or request a review of our decision please write to The Public Relations Department, West Midlands Fire Service, 99 Vauxhall Road, Birmingham, B7 4HW
Damien Preston-Booth is probably the smartest, most resourceful beggar in the world. Every week, the 37-year-old from Lancashire travels all the way to London’s Mayfair to accept donations from wealthy tourists – via credit card! He actually carries around a card reader to make sure he doesn’t miss out on contributions from rich people who don’t have cash on them.
Every Wednesday for the past five years, Booth has journeyed from his £300 a month rented apartment in Preston to London, where he pretends to be homeless, spending three days and nights sleeping rough and begging. He walks up to potential donors and tries appealing to their generosity. If they’re ready to contribute, he quickly whips out his mobile card reader that transfers all payments to his PayPal account. The reader is linked via Bluetooth to his smartphone, and the donor receives a receipt for his donation.
Booth has successfully managed to convert what is viewed as a rather ignoble occupation into a full-time profession. And he’s struck gold – a former friend claims that the man has earned thousands of pounds and even spent five or six holidays abroad in just one year! In fact, his Facebook page has pictures of him in Paris and Ibiza. Photographs in the media show him accepting payments from the likes of Simon Cowell and Sharon Osbourne.
“He is taking everyone for a ride and makes an absolute fortune,” the friend said. “He has befriended the super-rich at bars and restaurants. And if there’s a big party he’ll push through the photographers and ask celebrities for cash – he knows they won’t say no in front of the cameras. On New Year’s Eve, he made loads outside the Dorchester (hotel) where the Sultan of Brunei was having a party and people were throwing 50 and 20 pound notes at him.”
“That guy is really arrogant,” added Emil Staykov, chief porter of Lebanese restaurant Mamounia Lounge. “He asks our customers for money as they go in and then sleeps in the doorway. I have called the police on him loads of times and have been tempted just to throw him out myself. I knew he had money, he always has two phones.”
Concierge Karim Mouaj said: “He talks a little bit of loads of languages so he can speak to tourists. He knows Arabic, a little bit of Chinese. He has the gift of the gab. I am shocked he has a house and goes on holidays.”
He’s got a kind of Game…
Englishman Pete Mckenzie has been walking barefooted for the past 50 years. “I won’t put the buggers back on until the day I die,” the 69-year-old former telephone exchange engineer proudly proclaimed one day, after throwing away his shoes. And he has held true to his promise, renouncing footwear even on important occasions like his wedding.
Pete’s bizarre resolution has made him something of a legend in Birmingham’s pubs, where he is popular as ‘Pete the Feet’. He spends a major chunk of his day at these pubs, hawking homemade merchandise like stickers and cigarette lighter covers branded with his personal logo of two bare feet.
“I don’t like shoes, or in fact anything on my feet,” he explained. “Even when I got married, I didn’t wear shoes – and that was in a church. My wife has maybe seen me wearing shoes once or twice, but my daughter hasn’t and my granddaughters definitely haven’t.” Pete has been happily married for 44 years and luckily his wife doesn’t have a problem with his barefooted obsession.
If you believe a zombie apocalypse is imminent, then you probably should be doing everything you can to protect yourself. Luckily, a British firm called Tiger Log Cabins has just the product for you. They’ve created the world’s first zombie-proof log cabin, designed to withstand the worst zombie attacks imaginable.
The cabin is called ZFC-1 (ZFC stands for Zombie Fortification Cabin), and it is guaranteed to protect you from the walking dead for at least 10 years. It is surrounded by barbed wire and is equipped with an escape hatch, a storage unit for weaponry, and an upper deck with a 360-degree vantage point to keep an eye out for approaching zombies.
The ZFC-1 consists of three sections, all of which are independent from each other with two lockable doors securing each area. So if a zombie were to breach the main large section, it would have to get through three very securely locked doors. The material used to build the cabin are supposed to be of the highest quality, with glazing that is factory siliconed and internally beaded to all doors and windows. Zombies wouldn’t even be able to climb on to the roof, thanks to the square cut logs at the edges of the cabin.
Of course, there’s no way to test if the product is really effective against zombies or not. The small print reads: “Please note – we require medical evidence of the presence of a real zombie should you wish to claim under the 10-year anti zombie guarantee.”
Medical evidence? Do they want to catch the infection themselves? 😉
From a recent edition of the print-only publication Coffee News: